Dating

Showing posts with label Dating system. Show all posts

Christian Dating Advice for the Real World

Christian dating advice runs the gamut from "don’t date at all," to "you can date anyone and change them if you like them." Neither of these is practical in today’s world. If you don’t ever date, you’re going to have a hard time establishing a more significant relationship, and trying to change or convert someone is a recipe for disaster. Today’s Christian dating, advice from experts aside, can be successful and enjoyable if you keep a few things in mind.

Let People Know You are Open to Dating

While you may have heard horror stories about blind dates, a surprising number of them are successful. After all, who better to help you find a potential date than Christian friends?

Don’t Preach

When you do go on a date, be up front about your beliefs without preaching. This isn’t the time to convert an unbeliever, but it is the time to make it clear that the Lord is central to your life. If he or she respects this and shares this passion for God, you’re off to a great start.

Don’t Date an Unbeliever

Dating should, of course, always be enjoyable, but don’t compromise just to have somebody to do something with on a Saturday night. If you’re not sure where someone stands on their faith, you can certainly go out a few times and explore the issues. If it’s clear the person isn’t an active Christian, move on. Thank him or her for a wonderful time and reassure them that you want to remain friends, but stand firm that any serious relationship must be God-centered first and foremost.

Try Christian Dating Sites

If you are considering online dating, check out several sites that advertise that they are for Christians. Many of these even allow you to narrow your search by denomination so that you can find someone whose doctrinal beliefs and practices will be in tune with yours. These sites also often have single Christian dating advice of their own that can be helpful.

Avoid Temptation

As a Christian, you know that giving into lust or sexual intimacy is wrong. Dating can make resisting temptation difficult, especially when you’re physically attracted to someone. Don’t give yourself the opportunity to confuse affection or love with lust. Date in public places such as restaurants, museums, movies, etc. If you’ve dated a few times, invite him or her to join you in relaxing with family or friends – group activities are a great way to enjoy each other’s company while keeping temptation to a minimum. Remember this Christian dating advice: a relationship should be about love and respect, not lust.

Be Honest with Yourself

Is the person you’re dating someone you would be proud to take to your church and introduce to your family? If something about him or her makes you feel like you would need to defend them against criticism by those who love you the most, take heed! Those closest to you can see sometimes see more clearly than you do because attraction doesn’t cloud their vision.

About Committing Yourself

Proverbs 4:23 says, "Guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life." There is no better rule for dating than this Old Testament admonishment. And consider this Christian dating advice: commitment doesn’t happen after two or three dates. Keep your innermost secrets until you have become truly close emotionally and spiritually. Latching onto someone too soon means you could get hurt – especially if you begin to abandon your commitment to Christ in order to make that other person happy.

Pray for Guidance

Opening your heart to God and asking His counsel and guidance will point you in the right direction. Sometimes just refocusing through prayer will lead you to a better understanding of where your dating relationship is going and if it is right for you.

If you keep the above Christian dating advice in mind, you’ll not only have the opportunity to meet and date other Christians, you are more likely to end up in a strong, Godly marriage.

About the Author:

Kevin Urban is the editor at Dating-Site-Advisor.com, the single men's guide to the best online dating sites. He offers free dating tips for men and reviews the best matchmaking dating services on the web.

Copyright 2006 Dating-Site-Advisor.com
By Kevin Urban

Ask the Right Questions First

Sphere: Related Content

OK. You have joined a couple of dating services and written a killer profile. You’ve uploaded a good picture and now you are going to chat with a contact. What now? How do you start separating those who have real potential and those who don’t have any potential at all? You need to find out something about who this strange woman really is and not just who she wants you to believe she is. It would be nice if women wore labels like “Gold Digger” or “Daddy’s girl”….but they don’t so it’s up to you to find these things out and you can’t just ask direct questions. You need to know what mistakes you can avoid making and how to impress this lady if you decide you want to do that.

After you are past the initial small talk, ask her, “What are the biggest mistakes guys make when dating online?” Listen carefully to her answers. She’s going to tell you a lot about herself and her views on men in general.

Next you should ask her, “What do you really think about online dating?” Now she will tell you if she has had any bad experiences dating o line and help you to avoid making the same things wrong.

Now for the all-important one…..”What caused the break up in your last relationship?” If she puts all the blame on the guy, you should probably move on to the next prospect. If she takes all the blame herself, you should probably do the same. If she says the breakup was by mutual consent or that the relationship just wasn’t right for either of them, you’ve heard the right answer. Move forward but always with caution.

Asking the right questions will give you insight and make you more confident when you meet the lady for the first time.

Online Dating Safety for Women

Sphere: Related Content

Online dating can be a fun and certainly a rewarding experience for women of all ages. Maintaining your safety while doing it is simply a combination of using common sense and exercising good judgment. Online safety rules are the same as real world safety rules.

You wouldn’t give your name, address and phone number to a strange man that you met in a bar or on the street so you should never do that online either. Play it safe. Get to know this man who could turn out to be Prince Charming before you give out any information that could make it possible for him or others to trace you. Don’t tell a stranger exactly where you work. Say that you are a legal secretary (if that’s what you are) for a mid-sized law firm….not that you work for Brown, Smith and Jones Attorneys-at-law. It is safe to tell him what city you live in but you should wait to be any more specific than that until you have been chatting and exchanging emails for awhile.

Use only the tools provided by the dating service you belong to. Most offer chat and private email on their site. Do not give out your isp email address. If you must give out an email address make it a free one such as Hotmail or Yahoo. Your isp address is traceable for anyone who wants to go to the trouble.

When the time comes for you to have your first face-to-face, make that first meeting in a public place and during day light hours. Take a friend with you or arrange for one to call you on your cell soon after the arranged meeting.

Remember…you ARE in control so do not let anyone pressure you into revealing more personal information than you are comfortable with revealing.

The Advantages of Online Dating for Women

Sphere: Related Content

In the past, i.e. the 1990’s, online dating was a brand new idea. Unlike today, most people did not own PC’s or even have access to the internet. Times have changed. Online dating is not only IN the mainstream, it IS the mainstream.

There are many reasons for the phenomenal growth of online dating sites and the number of people, men and women of all ages, races and religions who use them as their primary source for meeting people and looking for “the one”.

If you don’t believe me, just ask your friends in the “real” world. If they are honest, most of them will tell you they have or are using an online dating service.

Here are three good reasons why thousands of people sign up for dating services everyday:

(1) You can be anonymous. You will never be required to give your real name, address, email address, phone number or place of employment to another online user. You, of course, may do so but only at your own discretion and only when you feel completely safe. You are not required to post a picture of yourself. Posting a picture, however, will get more responses to your profile. So you can surf through the other members on the dating site you have joined with complete anonymity.

(2) You have so many more choices online that you do in your brick and mortar world. Before the world of online dating came of age, the choice of friends and even of lifetime partners was limited to those we came in contact with through college or work. No more…the world is your oyster. You can go through hundreds…even thousands of profiles to find the right man for you.

(3) The “safety factor” is the biggest reason of all. An online dating service will never reveal your personal information. You get to choose who has that information and when they have it.